Matthew 18 : 15 – 20 10 September 2023
There’s something perhaps unsettling in the thought that your spiritual life, and mine, is other people’s business. But spiritual growth is always a community project. While we are converted individually, our spiritual growth is connected to a community of believers that can make or break our flourishing. A believer is part of a body, of a group of people, a church, whose spiritual vitality is interconnected. We’re a people marked by commitment to Christ and to one another. So, when you become a Christian you take on a new status, a new nature, a new family, and a new job description. We are Christ’s people, his representatives on earth and we’re in this together.
But what happens when things go wrong. What happens when you find you don’t get on with your Christian family? What happens when a Christian in the church family, fails to represent Jesus and has no desire to. Do we let it go? Shrug our shoulders and say that’s life? No, definitely not. That’s when Christian discipline comes into play and that’s where the passage we read from Matthew 18, along with other bible passages give us guidance and, as your book of order, your church rules says, these we are obligated to follow as far as possible without recourse to judicial proceedings.
Now Matthew 18, is a chapter that’s all about relationships with other Christians. In verses one to six, Jesus tells us that greatness in the Kingdom is not shown by the one who asserts themselves over others, but by the one who serves and is humble. “Whoever becomes humble like a child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven”.
Then in verses seven to 11, Jesus tells us that we need to look at our own behaviour, because our personal choices and decisions don’t just impact us as individuals, instead they impact other Christians and may cause others to stumble in their walk of faith, so this is important and raises the question, do we ever take time and reflect, asking ourselves what impact our behaviour is having on other Christians, on the church, on the reputation of Jesus?
Then in verses 12 to 14, we see God’s attitude to those who are wander off. We’re reminded that Jesus is the best shepherd ever. He loves the ninety-nine, of course, but he’s passionate in his looking out for the one who’s wandered off. “If a shepherd has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray?” And he goes after them, not to exterminate or eradicate the one who strays. Rather it’s all about restoration, for Jesus is willing to do anything to bring them back.
And that’s the context, the backdrop to the passage we look at this morning which starts in verse 15. We need to be able to relate realistically to Christians who sin. Sometimes that sin will be sin against us, “If another member of the church sins against you”.
There’s a parallel passage to this in Luke 17, verses three and four, “if another believer sins, you must rebuke the offender, and if there is repentance, you must forgive. And if the same person sins against you seven times a day, and turns back to you seven times and says, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive.” Peter seems to have heard that for back in Matthew 18, verse 21 he asks Jesus “Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive?”
But at other times it won’t be personal. Some manuscripts of verse 15 start “If another member of the church sins”. This is where the sinful conduct of a Christian has an immediate, wider impact on the church, which could be public and demanding action. But any sin in the assembly of God’s people is a sin against any of God’s people, for it stains us all. But the essential principles Jesus gives us are the same.
The reality is, as I’m sure we all know, tragically we must expect to be hurt by other Christians even in the fellowship of the Church. It’s a terribly sad reality and Jesus is utterly realistic about that. And that’s somehow reassuring, because these issues can hurt like mad, and we often struggle to deal with the situation in a proper way.
I recognise that this is a complex and sensitive area but in the time remaining I can only tackle this with broad brush strokes and here’s a first. I’ve called it the place for discipline. And the place of discipline is the church, the assembly of God’s people. Now ten Christians sitting together in the local park don’t constitute a church. But Jesus has given special Kingdom authority to believers gathered as a local church, which is not given to individual Christians. We see that in verse 18, which I’ll come back to shortly. Churches, of course, don’t make people Christians. But they have some responsibility in deciding who are card carrying, passport holding, bona fide representatives of Jesus in the world. It’s called membership. Basically, the church says to a member, we recognise your profession of faith, baptism and discipleship and affirm you as Christ’s. And the member says to the church, I submit my presence and discipleship to your love and oversight. It’s a two-way thing, for accountability is an implication of the gospel. And that has to be practised in church life. So, joining a church isn’t really like joining any other club or society. It’s a sort of ‘I do’ relationship, a little bit like a marriage. It’s a covenant of mutual commitment and expectation with nothing less than an expectation of personal transformation. And that’s the only context in which Jesus’ words in Matthew 18 make any sense at all. People who don’t understand church membership often struggle with discipline. But discipline is necessary whenever a gap opens up between a Christian’s profession and their life. And when we, the representatives of Jesus no longer seem to be doing that job at all, there’s a mismatch and there’s a problem, and it needs to be addressed. And the church is faced with a question of an individual’s Christian credibility, and that’s very painful, and can be very difficult.
The place of discipline is the church, the second brushstroke asks what’s the purpose of discipline? And the answer is always the same. It’s at the end of verse 15, restoration. Winning them over. Gaining them back. It’s a word from the commercial world. Accumulating wealth, gaining treasure you’ve lost, recovering something that’s very valuable. There’s been a loss, and we need to try to get that back. We’re not content just to let it go. And that’s the very heart of God, isn’t it? That’s what we saw back in verse 12, the one wandering sheep that’s so precious that God the shepherd goes to great effort to bring it back. That’s our model in this. Galatians 6:1 makes exactly the same point. “Brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path” It’s always about restoration. I don’t go to somebody principally to get something off my chest. Or for closure in my anger, or to dump on someone for my satisfaction, or even to resolve the conflict. No, I go out of concern for the spiritual well-being of the one who has hurt me. I go to win them back. I go to work for their restoration because they are in danger by their sin, because that saddens me, and it troubles God. And this person may be a pain, they probably are. But principally they’ve been a precious fellow Christian, and to God they are treasure. So the aim of discipline is not to put people out, it’s to keep people in. And it matters because they’re lost to the fellowship, they’re lost to ministry, and they’re missing out on the intimacy of the life of God, and that is tragic for both them and for us. Church discipline in the Bible is always a rescue operation.
The place. The purpose. Third, who is the person supposed to be doing the discipline? The minister?. The Moderator? The Elders? A sort of ad hoc discipline committee? It’s actually none of those in the first instance. One of the problems of modern English is we can’t always tell if the word ‘you’ is singular of plural, but I can assure you that Matthew uses the singular throughout verses 15 – 17. Who’s the star of verse 15? Who’s always taking the first disciplinary initiative? You, the individual Christian. I am. Now you might say that’s not me. I’m not a confrontational person. I couldn’t face that. But Jesus requires it. Verse 15 “Go and point out their fault when the two of you are alone”. It’s between the two of you. And go may well mean keep going while there’s hope of progress or change. There’s no other way of doing it. There’s no discipline committee. There’s no spiritual police in the church to sort these things out. It starts with you and me. And that, painfully, is how it is, your job is to go and to keep on going.
Of course, there are judgments to be made here. There are times in church life when, as one Peter 4 verse 8 reminds us, there needs to be a place for love to cover a multitude of sins. Judgement is needed. There needs to be an evaluation. We need spirit led wisdom to choose our battles here. If we try to call out every sin we see, we’d soon create a culture of anxiety and misery. But every now and then we do need to stop and ask ourselves, is there someone I need to go to, to try to put something right. Perhaps you’ve been putting it off and the time has come for action. Hear Jesus words – you go, for going may sort it out. The further stages of discipline Jesus talks about here are likely to arise only where sin is outward and serious and despite confrontation, unrepented off, and you tend to know those when you see them.
The place is the Church, the purpose is restoration. The person is you and me. Fourthly, the process. Step one. You go to them one to one. You don’t fire off an e-mail or a text. You don’t do it on Facebook or make this topic number one on a prayer chain. You don’t make it a public issue at all because the last thing you should want to do is drag someone’s private sins into public.
Before you go, remember that you have your own issues, that there’s no room for self-righteousness here, let alone spite or vengeance. Take the log out of your own eye before you take the speck out of somebody else’s. Remember that you’re not going to pontificate or to scold. So do the appropriate self-assessment, look into your own heart, and humble yourself before God and ask for his grace, for skill and for wisdom. Then go and explain the problem. And as verse 25 tells us the aim is always the same, that they will listen. Three times the word listen is used in these three verses. You want a hearing, you want the person to think, and if necessary repent or at least begin to. And frequently, the issue wonderfully ends there. That’s all it takes.
But step two, verse 16. If they won’t listen, take one or two others you trust. Preferably those who love you both, to establish the facts, to clarify the issues, to hear both sides of the story. Why? because maybe it’s you who are in the wrong here. Maybe you’re overreacting to a situation, making a mountain out of a molehill. Or maybe you’ve got a point, and this is serious, and it has wider implications in the church. This has got to be a careful and fair process, and that’s the reason Jesus quotes the Deuteronomy 19 witness requirements. So, keep it small and private with no more people involved than necessary to evaluate or authenticate genuine repentance. As James 1:19 puts it, it’s always a case of quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. There must always be a heart of love behind process. Look say the witnesses we love you; we care for you; we want a way through this for both of you. For this is damaging everyone, and this is dishonouring Christ, that’s why it matters.
Step three, verse 17. If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the Church, and your book of order has a process for this that sits alongside Jesus’ words. But this has to be done with great care for some members may be surprised at this news. They may be hurt to hear of the problem. Some will be close to the individual, concerned friends who may have the opportunity to be listened to, to hear the voice, but who had no idea of the problem. But here’s a further opportunity. Here’s a wider pool for influence and persuasion. But the signal from the church is always the same. We want you restored. We want you back in. And that’s what we’re praying and longing and aching for in all this. And that’ll go on for however long it takes the Church to conclude that an individual really is clinging onto their sin and is characteristically unrepentant. As Jesus illustrates so dramatically in verses eight and nine of the chapter, genuinely repenting people tend to be pretty zealous about casting off their sin. You know it when you see it. You know they mean business because there’s a bit of metaphorical hand chopping and eye gouging going on. It’s pretty serious stuff if people really mean business and repentance, but it may take a minute, or it may take a year. And restoration happens when the church is convinced that repentance is real, because they see the real fruit of change in a person’s life.
And then sadly there is Step 4. It’s rare but it’s something the church is authorised to do. Verse 17 “If the offender refuses to listen even to the church, let such a one be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Heartbreakingly, we have to say to them. You can’t be part of this. You have to be outside the fellowship. A barrier stands, relationships change, it’s not what we want, but it’s brought about by refusal to listen and repent. But remember how Jesus treated pagans and tax collectors? He loved them into repentance and new hope, Matthew had been one of them, he knew what he was talking about. Jesus loved them and lay down his life for them, but he only welcomed them into relationship if they took up their cross and followed him. Of course, we talk to excluded brothers and sisters though we no longer call them that. We invite them to meals in our homes, but not to church parties. We may sometimes ask them to services, but never to service. It’s a painful distancing, a cooling we can explain if they listen, and we continue to reach out to them in love, as we would any unbeliever. Here is a lost sheep choosing, intending, to stay away and that’s hard. Here is a person who apparently needs the gospel all over again, that’s hard too. It’s messy and painful at times, especially if we’ve been close or they’re in our family.
The place, the purpose, the person, the process. Finally, the power. What’s our authority for doing any of this? In Matthew 16, a couple of chapters back, Jesus spoke of the keys of the Kingdom in the hands of the church. And here in verse 18 he speaks of binding and loosing. It’s a law court sort of metaphor. We don’t stand alone as we pursue this painful process of discipline. Heaven somehow stands with us in this, in the church. And no, the local church doesn’t make somebody a citizen of the Kingdom, but it does have responsibility, the authority to declare who does and does not belong, who is to be in, or out of the church, who are or who are not Christ’s ambassadors in the world. It’s the embassy, if you like, that renews the Kingdom passports. The Church can’t see hearts, but it can see actions and lifestyles. And it has to make painful, and difficult, and sometimes agonising judgments on those in the light of God’s Word. Will the church make mistakes? Yes. Does there need to be immense care and sensitivity in the process? Yes. Are we struggling on our own in all this? No. So, here’s a warning to us sinners. The Church has authority to call us to accountability. And here’s an encouragement to those of us who are anxious about whether any of this can ever really work. The spiritual authority we yield has, according to Jesus himself, God’s sanction behind it.
The passage ends with that so familiar and so often out of context prayer reference in verses 19 and 20. “I also tell you this: If two of you agree here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you.
For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.”How often have you heard the verse used of a poorly attended prayer meeting? But this is its true context. The two of you in verse 19, and the two or three of you in verse 20, are they not the same two or three witnesses in the Jesus’ mind in verse 16. And what was the responsibility of a witness of fact in the Old Testament to a capital crime, Deuteronomy 17 verse 7 says they were to be the first to execute the penalty. And here it seems they are to be, not those casting the first stone, but rather those with Jesus in their midst agreeing on the first prayers. Prayers for good outcome in any disciplining, for restoration of the one whose gone astray. That’s the context of these promises. We’re not on our own in this process. Father, Son and Holy Spirit are superintending our fallible efforts.
Facing conflicts squarely in the Church is one of the hardest, most painful things some of us will ever have to do. For the Church of Jesus Christ is a unique institution. And to be a member of Christ’s body is a unique privilege, but it makes demands on us. And some of us know very well we need to put things right at once. There are other people we need to talk to, sort things out with, and some of us need to repent where we know we’ve been in the wrong in various ways because the Lord sees all our hearts. There are no secrets hidden from him. So, may God give us the grace to work out all it means to be accountable to Christ and to one another. But also, to be fearless and confident in confronting sin, and by His spirit pursuing that holiness in our own and in other people’s lives without which Jesus cannot be glorified in his church.